Write Well Me

Happy Holidays

Whether you celebrate Yule (which has already come and gone), Hannakuh (which has also come and gone - okay, so I'm tardy here), Kwanzaa (hey, I'm not late!), Christmas, or another winter holiday, may your celebration bring you joy and love.

Well-written Flatulence

Here's my Christmas present to you.  Enjoy!

Now that we have Samwise, it's opened up a whole new world of dog stories.  This one comes from Craig's List and has probably gotten more notice for its good writing than potential for helpful solutions.  (Although if you have a solution, I'm sure the author would be forever grateful.)

The original post (as long as it lasts on Craig's List) is here, but I've included the full text for when it disappears.

I have a male Cane Corso/English Mastiff who we will call "Petey" (this could damage his reputation). He will be 2 in March and, at 140 lbs, is still growing. He's the best dog in the world--friendly, energetic (yet will take naps with me, his sleep-deprived mom), and he loves his brother, a Chihuahua. He's never chewed on anything that I own (which is good, because I think he could fit my entire dresser in his mouth. Including the lamp.) But, we do have a serious problem.

Petey is...flatulent. To an extreme degree. Now, I know a lot of you out there are saying, "Hey, my dog (husband/boyfriend) farts all the time, so what's the problem?" I don't know how to explain it, but the best way to describe Petey's gaseous expulsions is with this word: "heavy". Like a dense fog settling on the mountains, Petey's farts will settle in the lower 3' of the room--about the altitude I inhabit while asleep. Thus, I fear that he may kill me (accidentally, I hope) in my sleep. Let me explain how the routine (when you go through this about 100 times a day, you make a routine) works:

• I'm in bed, innocently typing on the computer when I hear it: "FFFWWWWWPPPPPP"
• I look over at Petey, who was asleep next to my bed, and he is now fixated on his butt, with a look of confusion and wonder ("What was that!? Where did it go?").
• Petey looks up at me (no doubt wondering if I saw the little creature that he thinks ran out of his butt while he wasn't looking), and, after taking in my terrified gaze, thinks that he has done something HORRIFYING and he must move away from me before I yell at him.
• Petey jumps to his feet as I throw my comforter over my head to prevent my eyes from watering due to the noxious gas. In his attempt to slink out of the room unnoticed, he has shaken his intestines, which, in response, proceed to expel gas with his every step. In his mind, lots of little butt-dwelling critters are escaping, foiling his stealthy exit. I have yet to break it to him that he isn't stealthy at all, with or without the butt-dwelling critters.
• Hearing him exit the room, I crack the window behind my bed and shove my head out. 3 minutes later, I am in the clear. I shut the window and continue on with my work--shaken, but alive.

(At times I will get up to find him in another room, intently staring at his butt in hopes of catching one of those pesky critters.)

I live in fear. These are SO BAD that I actually wake up in the middle of the night. Please, does anyone have any sort of home remedy? I've changed his food, stopped giving him rawhide, tried to eliminate tasty treats that I know cause gas in humans (cheese, anyone?)--everything I can think of, but my life is still on the line! I am a student, so money is tight, please keep this in mind!

License Plates - Part II

Here's the next installments of the license plates saga.

I saw this one driving down the road, and I hope someone out there can clue me in to what it means.

MSTBABA

I figured it could be for a woman whose first name begins with "t." ("You can call me Ms. T. Baba.")

Misty Baba?  Master Baba?  A master's degree and two bachelor's degrees?

Little Beans

Chris and I were talking about a business associate of his who just bought a company.  Now, his colleague has two large, small businesses (get what I'm trying to say?  These are small businesses, but large ones).  He's also a member of the same leads group Chris is--you know, one of those groups of business owners that pass around leads.  I was thinking that with two large companies, did this guy really need the leads group?

So I say to Chris, "I'm sort of surprised that he's sticking with the leads group.  Isn't that..." and I was lost for the right words.  It was something having to do with it being too small.  "... little beans?"  Knowing all the time it wasn't right.

Says Chris, "Uh, you mean 'small potatoes'?"

"Yeah!  That's it!"

I'm great at concepts and not always so great at the technical names, words, or phrases.  Especially when we're talking about little beans.

Standing to be Heard

I had a wonderful combination Reiki and massage session with Nancy at Ojas on Tuesday.  It was a wonderful start to my vacation for my body and mind.  Not only that, the Reiki cleared some stuck energy, and I felt more grounded, centered, relaxed, and at peace than before I went in.

After it was over, Nancy shared with me a few insights she had as she was working on my body.  First, she said that I'm standing to be heard.  I asked her if that meant I'm trying to stand to be heard or if I'm already standing.  She said I'm already standing.

She also told me that there was a strong energy flow from my shoulder down my arms and out through my fingers.  She said it reminded her of Spider Man with spider silk streaming out of his hands. 

Now, as with horoscopes, Tarot card readings, and psycho analysis, I could read anything I want into her words to try to find some meaning and sense.  I choose to take her words as an opportunity to see myself and my life in a different way.  For me it brought up the healing power of the writing I'm doing.  The book I'm writing is therapeutic, reaching deeper than therapy has been able to.  Maybe that's because I'm in a safe, healthy place to go that deep, and writing happens to be the medium.

I'm going to finish writing the book, polish it until it shines, and put it out for the world to see.  I'd say that's standing to be heard.

Standing strong, tall, and healthy.

7 Random Things About Me

Kudos for Carla for getting me started.  Of course, since I sat on this for weeks, Laura beat me to it, but I'm going to tag her anyway since I don't feel like thinking on my vacation.

• Link to the person’s blog who tagged you.
• Post these rules on your blog.
• List seven random and/or weird facts about yourself.
• Tag seven random people at the end of your post and include links to their blogs.
• Let each person know that they have been tagged by posting a comment on their blog.

7 Random Things About Me

1. I was born in the back seat of a car in Mississippi.
2. My grandfather has driven me over the approximate spot where I was born.
3. My grandmother delivered me from the front seat of the car.
4. I am not obsessed with stories of my birth.
5. I have curly hair.
6. I attended six different elementary schools.
7. I love to play flag football, although I do more tackling than I'm supposed to.

Here are the seven people I'm tagging:

• Laura Howard West
• Antonette Artiz
• Sharon Broughton
• Stacy Brice, when she comes back from sabbatical
• Word Lily
• Meryl
• Any of the bloggers on The Virtual Wire

Enjoy!

Calendars, Vacation, and the New Work and Writing Schedule - Week 3

Last week started out with the best of intentions.  I worked all day with Stacy on the Ready, Set, Write program, and by the time we were done, kids were home from school, it was time to think about dinner, and my 30 minutes of writing seemed nonexistent.  No matter.  I had already decided that I would skip writing one day a week, so Monday could be my skip day.

Tuesday came and went, and I wrote like a charm.

Same with Wednesday.  I was on a roll!

Then came Thursday.  I woke up snarfly (my word for being stuffed up with snot - see, isn't "snarfly" a much better word?).  I had a day full of meetings and appointments, and I wasn't quite sure how writing would fit in.  As the day wore on, I felt yuckier and yuckier.   Forcing myself to write wasn't going to be anywhere near productive, so I didn't do it.  Friday I was even snarflier, so instead of writing all morning, I slept. 

Here's the thing about Friday and this whole week:  Friday was supposed to be my first day of vacation, a vacation that spans 18 days.  Aaaah.

Of course, with feeling snarfly, attending a band concert on Wednesday night, and in general being tired, I didn't get all the work done I needed before I went on vacation.  After napping all of Friday morning, I had to finish up a few things before vacation.  Same with Saturday.

With naps, Emergen-C, and nasal rinsing, by Monday I'm almost 100% better, which is amazing for the common snarfly cold.  Now, Monday, I can actually start my vacation.  Even one business day later, more than two weeks of vacation isn't too bad.  When I planned my December calendar, I was thrilled to see all the red "Vacation" days.  What does your December calendar look like?

I still don't know exactly how writing will fit in.  I know I don't want to give it up completely for vacation, which is a relief.  That must mean that I actually like to write.  However, I don't know that I'll flagellate myself if I don't keep to the original schedule.  One should be nice to one's self during vacation.  Let's all try that! 

(In case you haven't kept up with the new work and writing schedule saga, here's Day 1, Day 2, Day 4, and Day 5 from week 1 and week 2.)

What Dawn Is Reading Today - 12/12/07

If you're new to Write Well Me, read this to understand why I tell you what I'm reading.  :-)

I finished Anne of Green Gables, and I'm on to my annual Christmas book, Miracle and Other Christmas Stories.  I've been looking forward to this book for weeks, and it just feels right to be reading it.  I read it every year, and I'm sure I'll be writing about it as long as I have this blog.  Here's what I wrote about Miracle last year.

This year, as always, I start with the foreword and continue to the very end.  I love every word Willis writes, and each year I take away something different from Miracle.  So far, this year, it's the fact that every year I read Willis's emphatic recommendation of Damon Runyon (Willis:  "I love everything Damon Runyon ever wrote, and if you've never read him, you need to go get Guys and Dolls immediately") and P.G. Wodehouse (Willis:  "If you've never read Wodehouse either, what a treat you're in for!  He wrote over a hundred books.  Start anywhere").  Every year I read those words, and every year I think to myself, "I really should go get some books by Runyon and Wodehouse."  Every year I never do it (I never remember the authors' names once I'm at the bookstore, and Amazon doesn't let you feel the books).

This year might be the year I read Wodehouse and Runyon.

Nighttime

It's 10:00 p.m., and like most nights, I'm trying to figure out what to do.  Now, when you have fairly young kids and especially a new puppy, you're pretty much stuck with the comforts of home.  Add Chris going out to a movie on his own, and I'm feeling at a loss. 

Here's the thing, whether Chris is here or not:  I'm a girl with plenty of hobbies, but I never seem to want to do them at night.

Sure, there's the whole "I'm a morning person" issue, but I wonder if it goes beyond that.  For example, I could quilt.  But when I think of quilting, I want to do it during the day.  The idea of going down to the basement (which is not a dank, scary place.  It's really like any open floor plan in any modern house) at night doesn't appeal to me.

Likewise, I could cross-stitch.  That just doesn't do it for me either.  When I picture myself cross-stitching, I'm sitting in my family room, during the day.  I don't want to go up to my bedroom and cross-stitch.

I could work.  With my impending vacation (more on that Thursday), I have plenty to do.  But I'm tired, she whines, and I don't feel like it.

I could watch a movie, but geez.  We do that almost every night.  I do love my movies, but doing the same thing over and over again gets old. 

I could read, but with Chris out at the movies, it feels lonely.  Whine, whine, whine.

All this could be that I'm tired, but even on a non-tired night, it takes a lot for me to quilt, cross-stitch, read, or work.  The only activity I do consistently is watch movies. 

So, I'll blog (I found one thing to do during a small part of my night) and then I'll either read or watch a movie (my vote is for The Thin Man).

If you're a morning person, what do you do at night?  Do you have particular hobbies or activities that you only do during a certain time of day?

New Work Schedule and the Writing Life: Week 2

I've now had two weeks of the new work schedule and writing under my belt.  My observations:

• I get more work done.
• By the time Wednesday comes, though, I'm a little tired of working (or feeling like I work) all the time.
• It doesn't seem to matter how much work I get done, work multiplies.
• I haven't quilted yet, and I'm annoyed. 
• I choose how to spend my time.  There was one afternoon that I could have quilted, and I consciously chose not to.  If I want to quilt, I need to allocate a larger block of time (not just a "Oh, I have 30 minutes free here, and I could quilt") or do it first thing in the morning.
• I love my Friday afternoons off.  Last Friday I had a massage.  This Friday I'm having lunch and going Christmas shopping with Chris.
• I write a heck of a lot more.  Back at the beginning of November, I celebrated reaching 100 pages of my novel.  A month later, and I'm at 131 pages.  In a month, I've written 30% of what it took 7 months to write.  I'd say the new schedule is a good thing.
• I decided to take Wednesday off as a writing day again this week.  Last week it was because my Wednesday was chock-full of meetings, and there was no room for writing.  This week, Wednesday wasn't chock-full, but it was full enough.  I figure taking Wednesday off is a nice break, and it will help me avoid the stale routine feel.
• Even when it's hard to write and I don't feel like it, knowing that I only have to write for 30 minutes (except for Fridays) is manageable.  I could do almost anything for just 30 minutes.  (I'm sure I'll get a few comments like, "So, would you do ___ for 30 minutes?"  Within reason, people.  Within reason.)
• I see a difference between my 30-minute writing days and my long Friday writing morning.  On the short days, I'm just writing scenes.  On Fridays, I tend to be a little more careful, making sure that the plot and characters are consistent.  I don't plan it that way; it just happens.  Obviously, on the short writing days I don't want to spend a lot of time going back and searching, "What did so and so say back here in chapter five?"
• Just because I've allocated Mondays and Tuesdays as work blocks (Wednesdays and Thursdays are work days, too, but they generally get filled with meetings and lunches.  They're not full work blocks), doesn't mean that I must work all day on those days.  I CAN play (aka quilt) before I work.  Sigh.  That still seems to be one of the hardest lessons for me to grasp.

I have another regular week next week, and them I'm on vacation starting December 14 through January 1.  I have no idea what will happen to my writing then.  I won't be working, not even checking email. 

For you writers out there, does vacation include writing?  Or do you take it with you?  Or do just go with the flow and do whatever feels right?

(In case you haven't kept up, here's Day 1, Day 2, Day 4, and Day 5 from last week.)

Words and Rice

Daphne at Publication Coach directed readers to a cool site, Free Rice.  It's a cool vocabulary game, and for each word you define correctly, they'll donate 20 grains of rice through the United Nations World Food Program. 

I'm not usually into on-line games, but I'm enjoying this one, although it reminds me that I'm not as smart as I think I am.  To the world, I will admit that I haven't gotten above a level 40 vocabulary (the highest is 50). 

I leave it up in a browser, play a few rounds, and then go off and do something else (usually when I've missed a word and I'm not sure of the next one).

Increase your word power and help those in need.

Empurpled

I'm reading Anne of Green Gables, and it's taking me a little longer than with some books.  That doesn't mean I don't like it.

On the contrary, with a line like this, "After the Mayflowers came the violets, and Violet Vale was empurpled with them," how could one not adore the book?

I'm in love with purple, as is evidenced by the strong profusion of it all over Write Well U and Write Well Me.  I love giving out my business cards because one side is completely empurpled.  Life is good when there's purple in it.

(Empurpled now joins the ranks of other colors as verbs:  yellow, gray, green, blue, redden.  Note that some colors won't ever make a good verb:  orange, teal, aubergine, scarlet.)

New Work Schedule and the Writing Life: Day 5

Day 5 went well.  I was torn between writing right away and sitting with tea and cross-stitching.  So, I spent 30 minutes drinking lovely almond biscotti tea and cross-stitching. 

I only allowed myself those 30 minutes, though, and then I wrote.  I wrote for about an hour and a half, which is shorter than I normally might write on Tuesday, but I wrote more in that time than I have in weeks.  The constant writing this week has kept me in the story so that I didn't have to go back, review what I had written, and decide where I wanted to go.  I'd been doing that work all along this week.

After my writing time, I had a massage, followed by a little down time before Chris and I went to the annual Gaithersburg-Germantown Chamber of Commerce holiday dinner.

As I'm looking back on the week, I'm very pleased.  My work week was productive as I essentially added an entire extra day to do work.  My writing was productive (and enjoyable).  I felt more a part of my novel, and, again, I didn't have to spend a lot of time getting back into it.  Ending on Friday with the afternoon free and that wonderful Friday-it's-the-weekend feeling wraps things up nicely.

I'll continue this schedule, although I am still concerned about getting stuck in a rut and feeling as if I have to do any piece of this.  I'll just adjust as necessary, but I LIKE this schedule.  I don't wanna change!

(In case you haven't kept up, here's Day 1, Day 2, and Day 4.)